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Sunday, May 1, 2011

Spring vs. Head in the books.

So studying is starting to turn me into a not-so-fun person. It seems that my back pack and a self-guilt trip are always present with me.  I guess that this is just what it's like when grown-ups go back to school.

Places I've Studied;
  • In the laundry mat.
  • In the mini while waiting for kids at sports practice.
  • In the mini while the fam watches lacrosse.
  • on the toilet.
  • In the doctor's office waiting room.
  • At traffic court (for my hubs not me).
  • While pretending to listen in other classes.
  • In the bathtub.
  • While pretending to listen during phone conversations.
  • While burning dinner.

Oddly, just as my deep seated fear of failing has me falling asleep sitting up in bed with a pen in my hand, an open book on my lap and a stack of half-completed flashcards underneath my dog....I find out my daughter is failing Regents Biology.

I want so badly to be the understanding mom. But she's in 10th grade for crying in the sink. Shouldn't she have the fact that NOT FAILING takes a little effort ON HER PART figured out? 

I got the note in the mailbox as I arrived home from class, opened it in the kitchen and immediately headed out into a spring flood type deluge of rain...to go talk to her bio teacher.  Turns out, she doesn't turn in her homework or "correct" (can you believe that crap?) tests.  Sooooo I got the low down, a copy of her lab booklet, copies of all her missing assignments....surprised her as she walked into the lab 30 minutes late with her boyfriend...and headed home to play personal assistant to my 16 year old.

The remainder of the week was spent riding her to complete work.

I generally spend 4-4.5 hours of time each afternoon/evening helping kids with homework. I don't mind doing it. I actually enjoy it, especially when it coincides with stuff I'm studying, like the human heart!  But it really miffs me when I have to practically beg a kid to do their homework.  HELLO does ANYONE see what I'm trying to do here? I study constantly.  Shouldn't they see me as an example?

Cue appropriate verbage:

  • I practice what I preach!
  • I wouldn't ask you to do anything I'm not already doing!
  • I say what I do and do what I say!

I know I'm co-dependant. I get that.
"(co-dependency) often involves putting one's needs at a lower priority than others while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others"

But at what point exactly does co-dependancy begin? At what point do I stop going to the school, and digging to the bottom of mess' for these kids....so they don't wind up living in trailer parks, sniffing bath salts, and reading copies of People that they stole from the laundry mat (not that I know anything about that)???

Until I figure that out...I'll be working on MY homework at between the hours of 11pm and 4:30am. And buying new socks because I can't find time to search the house for them and wash a load, because my kids can't do these things for themselves consistantly. Advice is welcome.

Before you think I've lost my Inner Becca, take a look at my spring in NY (FINALLY) photos... Thank Goodness Winter Ends Every Year No Matter What!

Best Wishes,