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Monday, December 14, 2009

Holy Hell I'm Sewing

I was trying to figure out why my sewing expedition, also known as the "we're broke, cut up the sheets and curtains and make something NEW out of them to GIVE AWAY TO OTHERS" spectacular, has been so fraught with inner fury and foul language.

Well, the simple answer to that is, I don't know how to sew. The not so simple answer stems from poor feng shui and sewing in the most disorganized room in the house, which happens to also contain a stinky rabbit. Yes DD, Jacob is stinky. Cute but odiferous. 

Please note that my treadmill, which I fail to utilize as anything other than a dust collector, is also in this room, and contributes to my negativity and sense of BAHHHHHH guilt.

Earlier, my needle snapped. Holy daylight I lost my potatoes. I almost threw the machine, but then I saw this dent in the wall where I threw a coffee mug not so long ago, and I was suddenly contrite.

I drove down to the local sewing store. In this small town that means a 20 minute drive to the Mennonite Sewing shoppe. A thin girl with a mule face was trying to sell me A needle, yeah ONE needle.  I was like "hey aren't those four packs over there? I'll take one of every size."  They were like $1.50!  No sense in going back there anytime soon. They didn't even sell buttons. Mennonites totally use buttons I think, wouldn't you think they'd sell a few lousy notions at a sewing machine shoppe?

See, my Gah, I'm so aggressive. Knitting doesn't do this to me. Knitting is soothing. Yarn is soft and fuzzy. Screwing around with a sewing machine, frickin' aggravating. PS I had to adjust the flip flop frickin' needle 50 times to get it to sew.

Oh, and while I was doing that, I discovered a little button on my 30 year old $10 sewing machine that turns on a light. (After which I sheepishly turned off the electric lantern I stole from my kid and returned it to his nightstand so he doesn't trip over his match box cars and dirty laundry if he has to go pee in the middle of the night).

Man. Man oh man. Next year we are NOT spending the Christmas Club dough on October billarinos. 

Best Wishes,

1 comment:

  1. I feel your pain! Just keep breathing and you will get through it! :) If all else fails you can call upon your BFF to lend support. Or at leased drink a bottle of red with you!